How to Get Your Child To Take Responsibility For Getting Out of the House in the Morning!
We have now all been back at school for about a week. When I say “we”, of course I really mean our children; somehow it feels like we are too!
I have been asked to join a discussion on Woman’s Hour tomorrow morning to talk about this very thing – how DO we remain calm in the mornings under time pressures and somehow enable our children to take responsibility for themselves in the process?
Here are a few tips:
Children do not think in terms of “time” like adults can. Even up to the age of nine or ten they don’t REALLY understand what 15 minutes actually means. So it is useful to talk to them about what tasks they have to do in the morning in order to get out of the house, rather than how much time they have left. Make a list appropriate to their age of all the tasks that need to be achieved, including having breakfast, and tick them off as you go.
If you have a child that does a lot of messing around in the mornings explain to them that you haven’t allowed for messing about time in the task list, but if they want to have that included you will wake them up earlier.
Always explain the consequences of their behaviour, both positive and negative ones. If they are old enough, ask them “If you are late for school what happens….? If you arrive on time for school what happens?” Remember that the consequences happen to them not to you and they need to be reminded of this.
A rather obvious one, but worth saying – allow enough time for children to get ready at the pace that is appropriate for their age. Too many people rush their children because THEY haven’t allowed enough time for everything to happen.
Get each child to get their clothes out and extra stuff for school packed up the night before – this really takes a lot of stress away and is well worth the extra bit of effort at night. It is also a good way to start helping them to take responsibility for thinking about themselves.
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